Living by Your Values: A Path Through Chronic Pain
What Is Value-Based Living?
Value-based living means making choices and setting goals based on what truly matters to you—your core values. These are not fleeting desires or external expectations, but deep, guiding principles like connection, creativity, honesty, compassion, or growth.
When chronic pain enters the picture, it can easily dominate your life. But value-based living shifts the focus from what pain takes away to what still gives life meaning.
Why It Matters for Chronic Pain
Chronic pain often leads to a cycle of avoidance—avoiding activities, people, or places that might trigger discomfort. While this is a natural response, it can shrink your world and increase feelings of isolation, frustration, or depression.
Value-based living offers a different path. Instead of avoiding pain, it encourages you to move toward what matters, even if pain comes along for the ride. This doesn’t mean ignoring your pain—it means not letting it dictate your life.
How to Start Living by Your Values
Here are a few steps to begin:
Identify Your Core Values
Reflect on what truly matters to you. What kind of person do you want to be? What do you want your life to stand for?Set Small, Meaningful Goals
Choose actions that align with your values, even in small ways. If connection is a value, maybe it’s sending a message to a friend. If creativity matters, maybe it’s sketching for five minutes.Practice Psychological Flexibility
This means being open to your thoughts and feelings (including pain), while still taking steps toward your values. Techniques from Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) can be especially helpful here.Celebrate Progress, Not Perfection
Living by your values isn’t about doing everything “right.” It’s about showing up, again and again, for what matters—even on the hard days.
A Real-Life Example
Imagine someone who values being a loving parent but struggles with chronic back pain. On a bad day, playing on the floor with their child might be too much. But reading a story together on the couch? That’s a value-aligned action that’s still within reach.
Final Thoughts
Chronic pain changes many things—but it doesn’t have to change who you are at your core. By reconnecting with your values, you can build a life that feels meaningful and rich, even in the presence of pain.
You are not your pain. You are your courage, your kindness, your creativity, your love. And those things can guide you forward.